Monday, October 22, 2012

Who am I...

Yes, who am I? Who am I to think that I can be a building contractor?  I remember asking myself that question when I was in my early twenties just before I was getting ready to take my test to become a building contractor. How far out was that dream? I was just a mere girl working in the construction world. Then I remembered thinking, "well, the president was once a kid like me and he became president." So, what was it going to take to be a building contractor?  It was going to take a lot of hard work, determination, believing that I could, and a lot of faith in god. I once read that god will give you your hearts desire... but I never realized how much work would have to go into that saying. Yes, I would have to show god I meant business!
 It was the hardest test of my life! To comprehend all of the books I had to pass the test was intense. With my third try, I was ready to give up... but then a voice in my head said, "well, now you are just giving up. Trying to take the easy way out, your going to do exactly what everyone thought would happen."  Then with that said, I fought back, I was not going to quit, I came to far to stop here. I have got something to prove but not to others but to myself! I had to do it and I took that test again and still failed but for my fifth time of taking that test, I passed!!! I did it! I couldn't believe myself... wow, I did it. Who new? I then went off to owning my own business in construction. I bought out my fathers business and I took over.
  Now I find myself saying, "Who are you to be an artist?" "Do you realize how far out there that is?" "Many people have tried to be an artist and haven't made it, who are you to think that you will?"  Boy, oh, boy.... how that funny little question had come back to haunt me. Now I think to myself, "Well, I passed my contractors test and I remember asking myself who am I ?"  So, I am back to square one. I have got to work hard, got to have determination, believe that I can, and have faith that god will give me my hearts desire!  But.... This is something I want more then ever! This dream real feels like it could be that far out there but it is kinda funny how things just fell into place for me with this dream.
  Construction was beginning to get slow, my body couldn't put up with the Florida heat and I was coming home with headaches all the time. I then became inspired by my brothers tattoo work that I went out and bought paper, pencils and watercolor paint, so that I could start up an old habit that I had put a side for a while.  While still working in construction, my husband took notice to my artwork and asked if he could sell some of the prints on E-bay? I kinda' chuckled and said "sure." I just thought he was cute for thinking my art was that good.  Well, He went ahead and put my art on e-bay and they where selling! I was surprised.  Wow, people really like my artwork and while still working in construction, I wanted to make something of this. I then bought a book from my favorite artist, Jessica Galbreth, called the "Artist Manuel." I would read it almost daily. I would take what she had to say and apply it to my goals and while still working in construction, my dreams of becoming a fantasy artist was beginning!
From there,  I built a web-site on my own, my husband Steve helped me find equipment to make mugs, tiles and product with and I had a bigger dream! "I want to be an artist for the rest of my life!!!" Then as I was building up this dream construction started to fade away and art was right at my front door!  From there, I never looked back. I kept pushing forward. Now I have got to say that I may have peeked back, because construction was something I was so use to and it was comforting. This new journey is almost scary because I don't know what is going to happen. I just know that I need to believe! My hearts desire is in my hands.
  So, scene construction ended, I began to do art shows! How fun is that? All of the people that I get to meet, all of the people that love my art.... it is unreal! I never thought my art could make people so happy. My artwork.... my artwork!!! I look at it sometimes wondering what those people seen in it to make them feel that way. It is a very awarding feeling to me.
  Then right from the get go, I was receiving awards. My first show I had got 2nd place in, my second show I got 1st place in and at the Michigan Renaissance Festival I received the Best New Artist Award! God must be telling me something! :)
  So, who am I? Right now I am exactly who I want to be. I want to express myself through my art and tell my story. I want to inspire someone to believe in them self and that their hearts desire can be theirs too. I am going to work hard at it and I am going to try. If you don't try, then you will have never known what was in store for the future. So far this is a beautiful beginning and I believe that god put me here!

1 comment:

  1. I met you at publix the other day. You seem to be a very nice woman. You told me about your art. I am quite impressed. Keep being yourself , and telling your story. Very nice Charity!!! Keep inspiring people. Eric